The Shy Girl Guide On How To Start A Conversation With A Guy

how to start a conversation with a guy

Striking a conversation with a guy you just met can be difficult especially if you don’t want to be seen as desperate. Contrary to society’s norm, there’s no harm in shooting your shot. Here is the complete guide on how to start a conversation with a guy.

Who knows? You may be one step away from getting yourself hitched.

You can increase your chances of getting a yes if you play by the rule. So, if you want to know how to start a conversation with a guy, don’t sleep on these tips.

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How To Start A Conversation With A Guy

how to start a conversation with a guy

1. Boost Your Confidence Level

Every guy, whether introvert or extrovert, loves to mingle with confident ladies. So, before you approach your crush, do away with shyness.

Do things that will help boost your confidence level. Look yourself in the mirror and see how pretty you are. Call yourself a queen for trying to go against societal norms which isn’t so easy.

These things will help make you optimistic about what you are about to do.

Here are 15 Instant Self-Confidence Boosters and 7 Strategies To Build Great Self-Esteem as well as these 200+ Self-Confidence Quotes That Will Bring Out Your Inner BadAss

2. Make eye contact with him

Before approaching him, first, make eye content with him. Eye contact will help you know if he’s interested or not. It will further help prepare a good ground for interesting conversation.

Focus your gaze on his direction. If he returns your gaze, keep at it for a few seconds and look away.

 Try it again after some minutes and if he catches you again, it shows that he may be interested in talking with you. Try not to give him a steady gaze. He may think you are a toxic person.

See this scoop on 21 Flirty Questions To Ask The Guy You Like

3. Give Him A Charming Smile

Eye contact alone will not do the magic. While you lock eyes with him for a few seconds, follow it up with an inviting smile.

Your smile will give you out as easygoing and that’s one of the things guys love in their women.

If you give him the impression that you are good to be with, the chances that he talk and hang out with you will be high.

4. Pause To See How He Reacts To Your Advances

After locking eyes with him and giving him an inviting smile, you should pause and watch his reaction. His reaction will give you a hint on the next thing to do.

If he smiles back at you, it means that he understands the message you passed and would love to talk with you.

If he turns away after locking eyes with you and trying to converse with someone else, it’s a cue that he’s not interested.

5. Approach Him

If he smiles back, then, you have your cue. Approach him with confidence. Don’t pay too much attention to cat walking, just walk the way you used to but ensure it’s ladylike.

You will get rid of unnecessary anxiety if you are yourself. Don’t let go of your smile too. Make it as authentic as possible. You don’t want him getting a negative vibe, do you?

Some guys can smell a fake from a distance you know. So be real.

6. Ask A Question And Introduce Yourself

If you both are at a party or a club, starting with an introduction would be awkward.

That would work well in a corporate world but in parties, go for less deep and intelligent questions like:

Would you mind if I joined you?

How about we deal with this glass of tequila together? What do you think? Ensure you smile and lock eyes with him to make him understand the message you are trying to pass.

how to start a conversation with a guy

How To Start A Conversation With Your Crush

If you’ve been crushing on the guy long before now,  you should bother less about how to start a conversation with him. This is because you have a better chance of hitting off with questions that he will resonate with.

Knowing how to start a conversation with a guy you have a crush on is very simple. You just have to do a little digging into his personality before approaching him.

Does he often wear a nice cologne? What is his fashion sense like? Does he put on a popular brand often? Does he always sit alone in the club or is he the kind that moves in with a couple of friends? Do you always spot him with a book?

Tiny details like this can be your conversation starter. If he’s always with a book, it tells that he may be a nerd.

Questions related to books will not only get him interested in speaking with you, but it also helps him connect with you more than you can ever imagine.

If he always goes for a certain clothing brand, it gives him out as a sophisticated person. You can hit off your conversation with questions on his choice of brand.

You may be interested in these 13 Traits Of A High-Value Man Every Woman Should Know.

How To Start A Conversation On Tinder

You met him on Tinder and you are wondering how to start a conversation with him. Play by the rules. Here is how to start a conversation with a guy on Tinder The first thing you should do is:

  • Get To Know Him

Go through his profile to know what he’s like. While on his profile, look out for his interests, likes, and dislikes; just anything you know will get him interested in chatting with you.

If you hit the right spot, he will know that you’ve done your assignment so well and will give you a green light.

  • Ask An Open-Ended Question

After going over his profile, this is the best time to shoot your shot but how you begin makes or mars your chances.

Start with a ‘Hi’ or ‘Hello’ and follow it up with a question on what you saw on his profile. If you notice he swims a lot, you can begin with, “Hi, I noticed you have a thing for swimming. What’s your best swimming stroke?”

Avoid generic questions like, “How are you?” or a compliment that doesn’t encourage further conversation.

  • Share Something About Yourself

If you notice you both have the same interest in something, you can start your conversation with that.

Ensure it’s a topic that can be easily discussed with a stranger and not some personal stuff.

To be more specific, it can be sports, favorite clothing brand, choice of clubhouse, resort, or even wines.

  • Wait For His Response

After sending the first message, wait for his response. You don’t want him to think you are uncultured, do you?

Be patient and don’t go overboard by sending multiple messages. He will ghost you if you do.

  • Read Your Messages Again Before Sending

First impression matters and on Tinder, your first message speaks volumes. It will determine your chances of attracting his attention or not.

So, before you send it, check for typos. Check if the message carries your real intention.

Conclusion On How To Start A Conversation With A Guy

Approaching a guy you fancy doesn’t make you look appalling. Rather, it gives you out as a confident lady. Understanding how to start a conversation with a guy you have a crush on will increase your chances of getting a date invite.

 So, choose going for him over waiting for him to make a move. That may never happen but you may win if you make the move yourself.

Dear Queen, striking and starting a conversation with a guy shouldn’t be so hard. This complete shy guide to starting a conversation with a guy has all the scoop you need to hit on that guy you’ve been wanting to talk to for a long time now.

Go ahead and let the women in your circle know how to start a conversation with a guy without being shy or feeling you are desperate. Pin, Tweet, or Facebook. Remember, sharing is caring!

how to start a conversation with a guy

Kinging Queen

Jennifer Pompaski
Jennifer Pompaski

Hi, my name is Jennifer. I am an Engineer by day and a blogger 24/7. I am passionate about Self Improvement & Productivity and this blog is dedicated to that passion! I hope you find it worthwhile each time you visit! If you do find anything helpful on here, kindly share because sharing is caring!

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